JD Note: Get to the old days slowly, I share readers’ stories every Sunday. I haven’t done this since I bought this site again because no one sends them to me anymore. But earlier this year, Mike did. I like it i hope you do too
Earlier this year, I sent a text message to my wife: “On a scale of 1 to 10, how scared would you be if I quit my job this afternoon?”
My wife and I were married a little late, but she knew from our second date that I didn’t intend to work in my traditional job until normal retirement age. She also knew that I had not been happy at work in recent months.
We are very financially compatible – both rescuers were raised in working class families who did not always have much. We like to say “Art Family Finance Day” from time to time. On Art Family Finance Day, we do everything from our checking in competitively. Credit score Discuss the questions that are at the root of our money mindset to help us set our own goals.
But that question was not part of the plan. Not then
And it was never on the list of questions we discussed. It was like a pop quiz, a ditch in the smoothest relationship road I’ve ever traveled; and I put it there.
Dreams are left without dreams.
My wife and I rarely argue, but when we do, it’s usually about food. This is the kitchen and grocery store that is our battlefield. Our financial situation is fine. Thankfully, when you have confidence in the life you have made and the person you have chosen to make it with, it is very easy to be honest about what is on your mind.
That doesn’t always mean you get the answer you want. Or the answer you were expecting. He replied: “Wait. What will you do?”
A complete and reasonable question. Not to mention one that I might have to answer comfortably from a lot of people.
I think my immediate reaction was this: We talk about this thing all the time, my, “No worries baby, yolo!” (We must have looked back a lot of Romkom before we cut the cable from our lives.)
As an adult, it turns out, sometimes it’s really hard. I was going to learn that talking about something, and actually doing it, is a different world.
Life is full. Dreamers and doers. Sometimes those two personalities cross. But there are a lot of people out there who talk about a lot of things in life that will never have the courage to try – or discipline and determination to do it.
Who was i Dreamer? Doer Or this lucky combination of the two?
Standing on the ledge.
At the top of my bucket list of long-term goals is an excerpt:
“At some point, you will need to take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself if this is something you wanted to do at one point, but if it is something you want to do.”
Words are meaningless without action. Now it’s time for me to take a long look in the mirror. I thought about one of the questions my wife and I had discussed earlier: What does money mean to you? To me, once I got out of the “stuffing” phase of my early 20’s, my answer was always freedom. Money meant freedom. The answer for my wife was security. Money meant security.
You may see how freedom can conflict with security. It was like that here. Not only that, but I was asking her to change the perfect plan, with which she was comfortable and excited.
It is not one, but one. give Shots against financial security if I think more about us. Financial outline And how different they are, I must have seen him come from a mile away!
As I stood on the shore, about to quit my job, thoughts began to run through my mind. I did it in fact Will I have to lose if I jump? Very
- A happy relationship and marriage.
- A secure job with solid income, not to mention sixteen years of investment in my career.
- Lots of benefits, including long leave, health insurance, 401 (k) – even a pension.
- Ability to Endure anything At any time without any real thought. (Our funding was already on autopilot.)
- My work friend and work dignity.
- The general purpose of employment.
- Opportunity to create the wealth of the race. If we worked up to 65, Compound strength It will probably make us ridiculously rich.
Get up slowly today, let’s get some exercise. Let’s stand in my shoes for a minute, right? Join me on the edge. Do you see the beautiful scenery? Endless opportunity? The excitement that is felt only at the beginning of a great adventure, an adventure where anything is possible?
Or do you feel uncomfortable in your stomach? Do you feel as if you have lost your balance, as if you were on the brink of disaster? Are you seeing a terrible fall from grace? Does it want you back immediately?
Let’s feel like going back to that decision
I am 38 years old. I have worked for the same company since I was 22 years old. I know corporate insurance. I am well paid. I work from home with good benefits for a solid company, a lot of time off, and I really enjoy the people I work for.
This is the definition of stability. So what’s the problem?
A year ago, I took a new position that seemed like a great opportunity. It wasn’t just that. The first mistake of my career in one year, this place has taken away my enthusiasm and engagement. For the first time at work, I’m struggling to work.
As an extrovert who makes sense of helping others, it feels like a prison. My job is not difficult because it is stressful. It’s hard because it’s annoying me to death! And what do any of us think about personal finances and early retirement if we’re not trying? Make the most of our limited time on this planet.?
There is a project going on that will require some weekend work for the future, I have avoided it in the past, but my luck is running out. My team – and, more importantly, my position – needs to move forward. I totally understand. I just don’t want to do that.
At this point in my life, my time is more important to me than money. Weekends and holidays are what I live for. Adventures in the mountains with my friends, standard time with my wife, our dogs and our families – that’s what keeps me alive.
No young child has ever said they would like to work for an insurance company and play with spreadsheets and PowerPoint presentations when they grow up. I wanted to be a baseball player, sports writer, even a professional forklift driver. (Because what’s more rude than a forklift when you’re a kid and your dad works at the marina?)
A glimpse of the other side.
My wife and I arrived in Alaska late on our honeymoon. It was unbelievable to say that this would be a small thing. Denali. Kenai Luxurious train ride. Fjords. Glaciers. the bear. Bald eagle Wheel hiking
Life has slowed down.
Somehow I managed to read. Five Books doing many other wonderful things. During our two-week vacation, I saw what my brain is capable of when it is not immersed in useless information and worldly pursuits that use my intelligence.
We talked to people who ended up in this wild place through a history of risk taking. Parents who were reluctant to cross country and ended up there in the 70’s. Can you imagine Wherever we live, a fair number of people never leave their city or state!
Before the trip, I tried to apply for a few positions. For some reason, it didn’t work. I came home with a wonderful glimpse of life. Could do For a job that looks polar opposite. (Isn’t this every holiday?) Maybe normal life is no longer for me. Maybe I need something less common.
should I Stay or Should I Go?
I have been following the classic principles of personal finance since I was in my mid-20s. I found a horrible woman in her mid-30s who is also deprived of this lifestyle. We are probably two to three years away from where we want to be based on our master plan and a full-fledged home. Really Comfortable number of invested assets.
We will probably fall somewhere between agency and security. Stages of financial independence.
I know that good jobs don’t grow on trees, especially where we live. Of Economy season They are always changing and the air is cool. Economic winter. Not too far away my wife still has a solid job, and we live a very simple life – albeit in an expensive part of the country. Our main journey is travel, but otherwise we live far below our resources.
All this knowledge and preparation comes with a price. Having options can also be a burden, because then you are responsible for making tough decisions. And you are responsible for the outcome of those choices.
And what are the options?
- Become a lousy employee / co-worker, and still get paid? A lot of people have played this game. Have one or two surgeries, go on vacation, let Performance Management run its course no matter how long it takes, and keep checking caching all the time. I don’t think I can include people I respect. It’s not just who I am.
- I work from home, and I still can’t bring my laptop to leave. What if someone needs me?
- Am I giving up too soon? The finish line seems to be right around the corner – somehow so close yet so far away.
- Should I just suck it and sell a little bit of my life? Throw my shoulders a little because I trade another piece of myself for money I don’t need to buy things I don’t want?
As I go back and forth, I sometimes briefly wish I had never found a personal financial community. New like them. MatrixWhy do I have to take a red pill? Being a stupid user was not so bad. I would have invested 6-10% in my 401 (k) with the traditional pension.
Forty years of comfortable working life on autopilot, good things – and maybe some time to relax and travel in old age.
The whole point of everything I’ve done since I started this journey was to control my life. Don’t own things or situations. To have options. Freedom of choice. FU money.
I have the marks of a corporate war and the guilt of a survivor to understand why this is necessary.
I was sitting on the phone when I heard that my old department was closing. Sadness and tears in the room. Everybody who took me in, gave me a chance, taught me a job; basically gone, the disadvantages of business decision making.
I have noticed that people are very upset because they do not know how to pay their bills in a week or two. People will eventually recover, right?
What will happen to my friend who was struggling last year and left the company? He committed suicide a few months later. Probably everyone. Will not Finally get well Stress Runs in my family Am I really made for it? This thought is disturbing.
It has been said that one of the hardest decisions in life is to go away or try harder. Every bone in my body tells me it’s time to move on, to bet on myself.
About six months after the text exchange, with the help of the one who blinded my wife, I sent one of the scariest, most interesting and important one line emails of my professional career. It will also mark its unofficial end: “I will resign from my post on Wednesday, June 26th.”
To add a few lines from my favorite movie, Get rid of Shashank.Some birds weren’t just meant to be caged. It’s time to dump her and move on.